Do we Need a National Grief Day Really?

National Grief Day? Are you kidding me? Do we really need a day set aside for Grief in the world we live in today? I would argue yes.

One reason is because, honestly, I feel our country is grieving. What are we grieving? Well, considering there is so many changes daily to what is going on with the pandemic, not to mention what is happening over in Afghanistan, from where I sit, I believe this country is no longer what it was. Will we ever get back? My heart wants to think so, but my head says no, so it is a loss and we are all experiencing it.

Which brings me to my next point. We will all see loss of a person, thing, or situation differently. We will feel it differently and we will experience it differently, which means we will grieve in our OWN WAYS.

Grief is funny. There really are no rules on how to grieve. No step by step guide. No time line. No do’s and don’ts. The only common denominator is someone or something was lost, and with that loss comes a void.

It might be the loss of a person, job, friend, someone moves, someone leaves, a diagnosis that causes your life to change, or a tragedy that changes your lifestyle. Whatever it is, the list can go on and on. The overarching theme remains, something is gone or different and will never be the same. That void, no matter how great or small, will effect each person differently.

Some people are lucky and adjust easily, for others it takes time and that timeline is different for everyone. Adjusting to a new way of life without someone, or a new routine is awkward and can be triggering. But, the good news is, over time a person will become better equipped to deal with the triggers. How much time, again, is anyone’s guess.

There are seven stages to grief and, like I said before, some will get through these stages quicker than others.

1. Shock and denial….disbelief and numbed feelings

2. Pain and guilt

3. Anger and bargaining

4. Depression

5. The Upward turn

6. Reconstruction and working through it

7. Acceptance and Hope

Do any of these sound and look familiar? Think of a time you experienced loss. Can you identify the stages in that loss? I know I can and I realize we all have to go through each step at our own pace and our own order. What is important is that we acknowledge this and give ourselves the grace to do it our way and in our own time to get to our acceptance and hope.

And there is HOPE!!!!!

Whatever type of loss you have suffered or are suffering know this; there is no right or wrong way to grieve. But by understanding the stages and the types of grief, you will find ways to cope and you will get through it.

How do I know this? Well, I, personally, have experienced it too much and I have found that Psalm 34:18 brings me comfort.

Psalm 34:18~The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.

It is very clear from this verse that God understands if we are going through a trial or a loss we are going to be hurting, broken, and crushed. He wants us to know that is why He sent His son. Because there will be trouble and there will be loss, but He will not leave us. He is right here. He will not let us down. People, circumstances, things, well, those can and will let us down, but God is close when they do. He is right here with us in our suffering and in our losses. Yesterday, Today, and Tomorrow! God is right here. When you can grasp that, you can then go through the stages of grief knowing you are not alone and He will give you the strength that only God can. From that strength will come a peace that this world will never comprehend. A peace that no matter the obstacle, no matter the block, no matter the loss, it will keep flowing just like that river that flows around and over obstacles….peace like a river….that is the peace I want, and that is the peace God wants for you too.

So on this National Day of Grief hold tight to God knowing that while this world is ill and will never be the same, God is. He will not forsake you and He is right here with you and with me. Even in the chaos, confusion, hate, distrust, and the loss…..God is with you and you can take all the time you need to grieve because you are not and never will be alone.

XX,

Amy