What Is In Your Fist
What is in my fist? I ask myself this daily….what am I holding on to? What am I clenching? What am I white knuckling? For me it is my kids, but lately it has felt like life. The pandemic has me all over the place with my emotions. One minute I am so thankful and grateful for it because we are getting all this quiet, slow, family time…. and the next I am terrified for my family and myself. I find my thoughts going to very dark places…places of no return if I let myself go so deep. Then what do I do? I turn to my pillow, or to shopping online for stuff I don’t need, stuff I think will make me happy, or I turn to a glass of wine, or gossip, or lashing out….It is so unhealthy. So today I took pen to paper and here is what I came up with while doing a little exercise.
I grabbed a dollar bill. I gripped it like no other dollar bill ever. I closed my eyes, squeezed my hand over that dollar bill, my knuckles turned colors, my fingernails started making indention’s in my hand, my fist got tired and achy, I had to turn my head away and squeeze harder, I bounced my hand trying to get rid of the exhaustion, and I finally gave up and released it and the dollar fell to the ground. I imagined Satan laughing the entire time the dollar fell. Because that is what happens when we try to white knuckle anything in life…..We finally get exhausted and it crashes and Satan laughs.
Think about it. What are you white knuckling. Is it the almighty dollar? If so what is falling to the ground while you are clenching it? Your kids, your wife, your relationships? Maybe it is your health because you are so tired because you keep working for more money. Question: have you ever heard the saying, “You can’t take it with you and you can’t send it ahead.” What is suffering because money or things are your God?
Maybe it is your kid. Are you clenching so hard to what YOU THINK their future should be that you are missing all the gifts God has blessed them with? I did that with my middle son. You can read about that here. I was so convinced he was “Suppose” to be an athlete that I almost missed out on the amazing gift of his talent.
Maybe it is your friends. Are you holding on so tight to them for fear of missing out? Who is suffering while you do this? Your spouse, your child, your parent….your self. Are you neglecting who you are just so you can be included? How is that working out for your heart?
I don’t know what it is for you only you do, but I would challenge you in the exercise I did. Write down what it is you are holding in your fist. Then write down what would happen if you released it. My hunch is God will catch it and you. God will decided what you need and guide you to it. IF YOU GIVE IT ALL TO HIM. When we trust God, and truly let go, it is then that our hands become free. Free to love. Free to serve. Free to worship. Free to be held by our Heavenly Father.
When we are holding hands with God miracles happen. When we release whatever it is we are holding onto and truly let go you might be surprised at the peace you will feel. You might be surprised that you actually have missed your loved ones. You might be surprised at how tired of the rat race you are. You might be surprised that your kiddo has some seriously amazing gift you never even knew possible. You might be surprised your friends will still love you even though you can’t be there always. You might be surprised at just opening your fist just in the slightest a miracle might happen. So open up that fist. Let Go. Let God.
What are you holding onto that you can release to God.
Is it the state of the world and this pandemic? Release it. Give it to God because what can you do about it? Write down what you can with it and give the rest to God.
Is it National Security? Release it. Give it to God because what can you do about it? Write down what you can do with it and give the rest to God.
Is it Money, Riches, and Wealth? Release it. Give it to God. Write down what it means to have all that money, riches, and wealth. What would it help? What would you sacrifice to have it? Would that be worth it? Then give it to God.
Is it Things? What would it mean to have all those Things….or even just that one thing. Write it down. What would you have to do to get it? Would you or anyone sacrifice while working toward it? Would that be worth it? Then give it to God.
Is it fame or acknowledgement of some kind? What is that about? Write it down. What would it mean to get it? Would it change anything? What and how? Would anyone sacrifice while trying to get it? Would you? Write that down then release it to God.
